In the greater direction of life, I am entering the period of my 1st Saturn Return. This period is all about entering a new phase of life. Will I continue to engage in behaviors or hold ideas that no longer serve me? Or will I shed the more juvenile definitions I built in the last 20 something years, in favor of more mature ones? As a Sagittarius, freedom and boundaries are a critical issue. This is an opportunity to examine what freedom means and how to effectively respect and set boundaries.
See that pic above? Nothing encapsulates more of what I mean by respecting boundaries. That is Hades taking Persephone. The power of Pluto is such that it will take you if you don't willingly go.
With a natal 1st house Pluto and Venus in Scorpio, I have always felt drawn to its energy. I am a 0 degree Sage, born on the cusp of the underworld. Consciously, I chose to be born on the other side of the gate. My mission is to move forward but my temptation is to go back. There is nothing evil or wrong with Pluto or Scorpio, that is not the point. To build a positive relationship with this urge/energy, I must go back. To rephrase: my temptation is to go back and stay, or avoid it altogether.
Temptation infers a powerful, compelling force where resistance is a choice. Compulsion implies even less of a choice to me, yet, that's what happens when temptation is repeatedly indulged. Of course, resistance can create the same dynamic. I believe that anything that isn't healthily expressed from the birth chart gets locked in Pluto. Whatever sign and house Pluto is in, is a key or clue to unlocking your underworld, and releasing that concentrated energy. The sign is generational but the house gives more personal context.
Pluto is not an obvious planet, you have to travel deep. The journey in itself is meaningful. It represents the edge of our world. When you get there, a 3-headed dog is guarding the gate. That is your fear, you don't just stroll in the underworld. It takes courage (Mars) to face that fear and win. Progressed Mars conjuncting Pluto allows me to take advantage of an opportunity to directly face my Cerberus and release some of the power stored.
I've always looked at my Mars in Libra like a physical handicap. "I'm a Mars in Libra, exercise really isn't my thing." "I'm not one of those active types, I'd rather do something else." Consciously and unconsciously, I've allowed a notion about myself (Pluto 1st house) to become an excuse. That is an unhealthy expression of that Mars energy, so all that power is being redirected to Pluto. If I look deeper, as a child, I had asthma and glasses...well, I still do. I also began getting husky around 3rd or 4th grade. I didn't play any sports really, the last time was soccer in 6th grade. I usually did not appreciate gym unless we played dodgeball. I can either continue to ignore my health and be lazy, or I can move past that conception of myself. I think I ignore the fact that I'm overweight everyday. Sometimes I avoid the mirror. My confidence is lower than my optimism. But I can elevate my expression of Mars in Libra. It could be asserting myself to look great, not just in terms of style but physically as well.
That is the challenge with Pluto: going beyond the surface to the actual events, to specific instances. Pain is kept there..where are you limiting yourself due to past trauma? Realizations may be quick but the process will take time. What are your avenues for catharsis? Hopefully, you have healthy coping methods. I have an ex that would cut herself. Many people turn to drugs and alcohol. Some turn to crime and violence. None of these ways address the pain directly. Finding a constructive method of release is key. I don't want any of us ending up on Law and Order: SVU.
As far as dating..I see these next few weeks like a valley of temptation. In Buddhism, Mara (the equivalent of Hades) did everything in his power to stop Shakyamuni from attaining enlightenment. Mara isn't really an external force..he comes from within. I feel like doubt precipitates temptation, and Buddha had to win over his self-doubt and insecurity to attain enlightenment. To parallel, I recently realized what I was looking for in my next relationship. I was focusing more on the emotional connection than the sex and physical aspects.
Now it seems that while I know what's good for me, the temptation is to simply attain sexual pleasure. My compulsive behaviors, dating-wise, rear their ugly heads. It would be easier to simply give in and enjoy myself. It would be easier to do what I've always done and get what I've always gotten. How honest will I be with myself? Temptation can be so strong that you know wrong from right (relatively) and still choose wrong.
I mentioned doubt...'Pluto' may say "You don't know what's out there! At least you know what you can get here, right now!" A false power scenario is created; the lie is that facing the unknown will rob you of your power. Your doubt and fear surrounding change prevent you from evolving. Inner strength and courage will allow you to take advantage of this opportunity to reveal profound insights about your identity. Don't miss it!
-Shade
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