Cancer Midheaven

Well, I certainly experienced a shift last week. A few actually. I can define them as Saturnian: recognizing the 'cold' element of life and the need to emotionally dissociate in order to grow. The first I experienced while processing after my last short-term relationship ended. One morning, I woke up and realized "it's a cold game," which translates to "there are laws of nature and being a nice person has no bearing on my success." I need to be more assertive and focused, my survival/success in career and relationship fulfillment depends on it.

I had a marked shift in outlook on both, the most pronounced being the shed of emotional trauma. Every day, I am more comfortable or accepting of the fact that it "isn't personal." The dream job I wanted and seemed so close to getting but didn't...can't let it crush me. It is disappointing but the reality is, I didn't get it. So I need to reflect, improve, and move forward. The girls I've "lost" in the last few months, same thing. So a new strategy and mindset is being forged as a new foundation.

Palmistry has called me once again, and I've been reviewing. Women love it! It can be quite a magical, sensual experience. I confirmed some things about myself: creative, intuitive thinker, outgoing personality, sensual and highly sexual. A downward curving head line finds success in the arts and I've always wanted to work in that area of things. I'm not a highly logical, rational type, which is why I've always been averse to number-crunching or working in the financial sector.

My Midheaven is in Cancer and I have been thinking about what clues it can provide me in terms of direction for some time now. Here are some excerpts:

From Astrolo Cherry: The Midheaven or the 10th House traditionally represents the highest point in the sky; and these individuals feel their ascension closer with every act of service or charity.They tend to be guided by a profound intuitive compass, and structure most of their dreams on instinct and the need to replenish the broken with unconditional love. Midheaven in Cancer personalities are ultra receptive to hidden emotional undercurrents and the inner fears of others.  The placement of the Midheaven here relates to generous creative flairs and the deviation toward professions that indulge their artistic expression. These individuals make natural teachers and mentors, and possess a special gift for helping every soul find their sense of belonging in the world. They may be attracted to industries surrounding counselling, culinary childcare, midwifery, business or politics and work with mostly women...Much of their professional success stems from their acute intuition, magic networking abilities and being in the right place at the right time. They may be naturals at handling fiscal matters and reap favour in roles where they can financially counsel or work with investment. Midheaven in Cancer seek the calm and tranquil life and look forward to leaving work and delighting in their own inner sanctuary.

From Always Astrology: The innate restlessness that resides in Cancer Midheaven may cause many changes or at least some highs and lows in their career. They need a career where they can connect with those they work with, and use their intuition. They like to feel respected and responsible. They are very sensitive regarding their reputation and standing. They do well in a career that serves the public in some fashion.

Cancer Midheaven may find themselves the center of attention, either on purpose or by accident. They may become famous or infamous, depending on the circumstances. Careers in lecturing, politics, or other public office may beckon. They identify strongly with their career and reputation. They may enter a family business or work with women, babies, food, housing or retail. Healing, pediatrics, education, or social work may be fulfilling.

From Libra Rising:
Cancer Midheaven General areas for Cancer Midheaven: Affairs of women: all phases, especially biological and sociological
Cultural resources and activities: especially with regard to tradition
Diagnostic and healing arts: many phases, especially concerns of women and children, nursing, counseling, in-depth psychology
Domestic arts and sciences: especially survival needs, i.e., food, shelter, and clothing
Finance: especially commodities
Fine arts: many phases, especially creative writing
Human resources: especially personnel work
Natural resources: especially the soil, the sea
Politics and public affairs; all phases, including trend analysis
Real estate and housing: all phases

From Astrology.about.com:

Midheaven in Cancer: You come across to the public as intuitive, caring, and able to read situations on a deep level. Some possible fields are pediatrics, healing therapies, child care and education, intelligence services and social support. Your ability to tune into emotional moods makes you good at influencing others, in public service, or in commercial fields like advertising, marketing. You are trusted and liked, and this helps you form webs of support that help you in your career through word of mouth. You'll likely find mentoring others a natural role. Your imaginative gifts find a channel in the arts, and you could make a name as a translator of human emotion through your work.

I see now...my turbulent work history is like the highly fluctuating moon. I have worked in managerial and non-managerial roles, been paid hourly and salary, full, part time, and temp. I haven't worked for any employer longer than a year and a half, most have been 7 months or shorter. Sometimes, I have longed for a set schedule, like a 9 to 5, other times, I've liked different schedules every week. I don't like working long hours, somewhere between 35 and 40 is best.

I have never had a job that I felt capitalized on my biggest passion and talent: creativity. I am very good at connecting with and inspiring others, which has lead to thoughts of becoming a motivational speaker. But how does one do that? I have used my creativity and charisma (emotional engagement) to sell lingerie. If only Victoria didn't want my soul, I would still be keeping her secret! It is difficult for me to brand myself, due to the volatility of my work history, which leads to a pessimistic resignation to my fate. Really, I feel a combination of indecisiveness and inadequacy to pursue my dream career. But there is an unrelenting optimism that drive me toward a success I've never stopped believing will manifest.

Also present on my palm is a marking called the Ring of Solomon. On my passive hand, it is curved and on my active hand, it is straight. In general, it denotes a love of the occult and wisdom judging others with psychic skill. When it is curved, emotions/intuitions/gut-feelings play a larger role in discerning, while a straight line means logic is more involved. This also indicates a person who is a natural teacher. Teaching has always seemed like something that comes naturally to me and it is appealing when I think of it: I am able to use my charisma to actively engage students and inspire them to become independent thinkers. I am also afforded some independence, as I can set a curriculum and lead the course. Only issue is, teachers don't earn that much. Professors have a higher pay scale but I would need 2 more degrees.

Aside from all this ruminating, there is one realization I've come to: the importance of long-term planning. Due to me being in debt, I always feel this urgency to find a job that will pay me enough. That is a reality for sure. But salaried positions generally have a longer hiring process. What was exhausting about this last job I applied to was how long it was. It was my fault for not actively applying to other places during. I feel a strong resistance towards working some 40k job 'just to pay the bills', which sounds foolish I know, but I'm tired of working someplace I don't have a true passion for. So, short-term strategy and long-term strategy are needed.

Short-term is working something to pay the bills, and long-term is ACTIVELY seeking out a job that will build my career, even if that involves going back to school. Working in fine arts would be my ideal, maybe event coordinating as well. Both jibe well with Cancer midheaven. Travel journalism would also be a great field. No matter what, I need to initiate my path and work towards it. I have an absence of a Fate line, which is said to indicate one who controls their own destiny. I wholeheartedly believe that, because once I decide upon a course of action, I am unstoppable.

New Beginning: Triple Conjunction in Aries and Chinese New Year...of the Ram

I am always amused when things like this occur, almost like an infant watching a mobile above. Honestly, I only know that the Chinese calendar is lunar, so this may be a common or expected occurrence. There are 12 animals in their zodiac, although, they don't correspond to the Western zodiac signs from my knowledge. Anyways, I don't want to fry my brain here, let's have some fun!

Year of the Ram begins tomorrow, Feb. 18th, and the moon, Mars, and Venus, are conjunct in Aries Feb. 20th going into the 21st. It is not an exact line up but close enough. Chinese New Year actually ushers in on the Pisces new moon. Pisces just "broke up" with me a few days ago. Just my anecdote but its clearly new beginning energy at work. Aries LOVES starting fresh, and I welcome the emotional, energetic, and amorous clean slate.

The sun, unfortunately (kidding), will be in Pisces. Neptune is also in Pisces, so I think it is best to not get too carried away with fantasies and ideals. Cautious optimism. As one with an Aries moon, I have began more relationships with "the one" than I can remember. But everything isn't always as it seems and it takes time to realize that. Time that Aries isn't known for entertaining. Whatever it is that we're beginning, let's keep that in mind.

I feel I am awakening from a daze. Perfect timing or...I'm not going down that road. Jupiter will be trining my moon and DC exact on the 20th. I have been experiencing a wave of Jupiter transits and this is the last until it goes direct in April and experience the former again in May. What does it mean? I see it as a great opportunity to put my energy into something I want to kick start, whatever that may be. The worst thing you can do with an opportunity is to do nothing and waste it. Aries loves action, best be taking some. Arrrggh! Sorry, sometimes I turn a little pirate.

Well, let's see what happens this week. I don't have any plans at the moment, except a concert I may or may not go to tomorrow night. No love prospects, the bouquet has withered. My shift in mindset has been that I'm going to have to get a lot more assertive if I want the life I envision. None is more assertive than the ram, so I'm going to apply myself career wise. I don't want to go into March with that chimpanzee on my back, he's already got his finger under my nose.

February Fro-licking?

Hahahaha forgive my entendre of a title. I think it's just a triple but I had way too much fun with that hyphen. So, ahem, time moves forward. In January, I got a job, although I'm still waiting to hear from the full-time dream job. It has been the longest hiring process I've ever experienced, as it's now entering 3 months. I also was intimate with 5 different women, which is a first (maybe). I've had some changes in my outlook regarding relationships, as I begin to abandon the ubiquitous narrative I have held as truth for so long. I still have some financial hurdles, which means I have an abundance of time. An opportunity I have seized to read, read, and read more.

I am happy the Super Bowl is over, with my team winning!! It is weird, since I have been so invested in this Tom Brady character as a role model of sorts, and he has proved his unequivocal greatness to me and I'm sure millions of other people. Not a huge amount of psychic energy there, but the resolution gives me slightly more relief than satisfaction.

So February...Valentine's Day, Black History Month, Aquarius season, tax return season. I experience 3 major transits, all involving Jupiter: Jupiter trine Uranus, Jupiter sextile Mars/AC, Jupiter trine Moon/DC. Lots of love, lots of energy, lots of unexpectedness. The weather has dampened my adventurous spirit but I look to widen my social circle during any reprieves. Venus and Mars are in the same sign and even degree from the 21st-22nd, during which the Moon and Uranus are also in Aries. Retrograde ends on the 12th, so V-Day plans are spared a bit of chaos but still playful with a Sagittarius moon. I predict fiery love!

My goals for February are 1) start work at the dream job, 2) establish a new rhythm, 3) continue reading and learning, 4) more love. I'm a simple man. I say more love because as I mentioned, I'm changing the narrative. I've assumed a very linear path for my life, especially my romantic life. Date for a while, get married, have children, etc. While I don't want to be lonely in my later years, I am giving myself more time, despite the alarming number of peers who are taking those "next steps." So much to learn and experience!

In a month marked by Jupiter transits, February will be a good time for this Sagittarius. Then again, when has optimism not been our modus operandi?