I've probably said it before but I think synastry is one of the most fascinating aspects of astrology. There are many questions we want the stars to assist us with but I would bet love tops the list. I have been interested in this from the beginning pretty much. There is a lot to say about synastry but I want to start with this: I truly believe you need some experience with the person you're involved with to really benefit from a comparison. Sun signs can be a great initial indicator but there are a lot of other factors that need to play out. For example, if I do an early comparison and see Mars Conjunct Venus, that supports a great relationship but how it plays out depends upon each person.
I have been dating this beautiful woman for almost 3 months now, and after comparing our charts today, I could see some things clearly and others I may have more questions about. I had initially done a rough comparison around our first date. Too early, and I was wise to not really go into detail. I just knew she was Gemini and that usually resulted in an intensely physical, unstable/sporadic/short-lived union for me (Sagittarius) in the past.
Before I start, it occurred to me how important it is to recognize what we ask from synastry. At first, my question was: are we a good match? But really, I wanted to know: is she the one? Which translates to: I want to know the future. The truth is, no matter how good (or bad) a comparison looks, it doesn't spare you the pain of breaking up, should that happen. If you're a bad/challenging match with someone and are together for a year and you break up, are you gonna say "well, we weren't that good of a match anyway, so whatever."? I doubt it. The closest I get to divination is transits and likelihood, so all I can realistically hope for is some reassurance/support, possible actions to take or things to discuss, and to learn more about astrology.
And on the subject of realistic expectations, let's start with Saturn. My Venus conjuncts her Saturn within 5 degrees, which means, she is likely to be the sobering one. This can be interpreted as an indicator of long-term commitment/relationship, which makes sense. At the moment, we are not exclusive and are both still dating other people. We had a "talk" about a month ago, because she wanted clarity (so did I) around what I was looking for, feeling I was working towards boyfriend/girlfriend. I was flexible and we ended with a more casual/friends-with-benefits scenario.
As a result, I've had this relationship with her where I'm out of my comfort zone, which is supported by a wide (5 degrees) North Node conjunct Venus. I deal with feelings of jealousy and inadequacy, and see her as secretive--my fear being there's some other guy or guys she likes more than me. I am painfully aware that its my ego, yet there is an air of mistrust (Neptune Conjunct Sun, within 3 degrees). That can also be a sign of unrealistic expectations.
North Node/South Node axis is seen as karmic, with NN being our lesson to learn and SN being what we need to let go of. My North Node conjuncting her Venus, in light of my Venus conjuncting her Saturn, can be interpreted as me learning from her/our relationship. This is definitely true, especially regarding sex...I got back into Tantric sexual practice and am deepening my sensuality. But my Venus is conjuncting her SN (opposing NN), which would mean she is more likely to "outgrow" our relationship, feeling like there is nothing left to learn. I've read this can be an indication of star-crossed lovers who aren't meant to be together this lifetime but in the future. I do believe in reincarnation but that has a ring of fatalism to it.
What is clear is that we have undeniable, explosive sexual chemistry and physical attraction (at least on my end!). My Mars trines her Jupiter within 0 degrees...I can't get enough of her and she responds well to my passion. I would say its the most passionate relationship I've ever been involved in. Venus opposition Venus is also very physically stimulating, although we approach relationships differently and may have very different social lives. I'm a believer in the physicality of oppositions, as Gemini's have been the sign I've hooked up with most. But this is the longest I've ever been physical with one. All the others were always random occasions but usually more than once.
My Vertex is conjunct her Venus by less than a degree, which suggests a powerful connection where I see her as my ideal woman and that separating will be difficult. Just to reinforce that physical attraction is my Sun conjuncting her Ascendant by less than a degree as well. Sun trining her Moon, by less than degree, is a major compatibility factor as well.
There are a few other aspects but I see a theme already: magnetic physical attraction. This is no ordinary encounter. As far as timing, Saturn is just separating (conjunct) my Venus and her Saturn is returning. I believe things will become clearer to the both of us over the next few months. I have a feeling the solar and lunar eclipse in October, with all the Scorpio energy, will be decisive if we make it that far. Mars makes some significant transits to her chart in October as well, which could represent another man. This weekend is the last hard outer planet aspect to my sun/moon midpoint and I'm glad it's Jupiter. Beyond the physical attraction and affection, it's a wild card.
Where to go from here? Well, I just started dating another woman earlier this month. We are actually extremely astrologically compatible for a lasting union but only time will tell if she becomes a 'case study'. I seemed to have a lot of women interests earlier this month but it has calmed down considerably, basically to these two. I will try to communicate with her more, (we have a date this weekend) but I'm afraid to know what she's thinking. I have these feelings actually beginning to develop for her that make me want to bond deeper but I don't know how she feels about that level of emotional intimacy with someone she "doesn't see a long-term future with." Stay tuned...
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